So close, but still so lonely
Posted by Headblogger @ Tag | Posted in Tag Communications | Posted on 20-07-2011
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Is technology bringing us closer or actually increasing the distance?
It has never been so easy to contact a friend, family member, work colleague, your boss, a client or vice versa. I have a love-hate relationship with technology, I wouldn’t or probably couldn’t give it up without a struggle but I think that whilst it connects us, ironically it also disconnects us.
If I consider the mode of contact only 15-20 years ago, the whole way we now communicate has actually shifts and it definitely has an impact on the end-result. I remember not being able to contact a group of friends to tell them I was going to be late or you would hear the boss receive a phone call from a sick employee; or you would receive a hand written card in the mail or better still a visit from family and friends on your birthday.
Fast-forward 20 years and you’re more likely to receive a text message that says – Runin la8 b there in 10 [more likely be there is an hour and a half because I actually haven't left home yet - but how would you know?]. What about “unwell, wont be in, sorry!” [I'm not sure how many employers would actually call the employee and question them about the type of illness or really listen to the sickness in their voice?]. And then there is good old “happy bday, have a gr8 day, c u soon” [I have certainly been guilty of that one and soon could be closer to their next birthday].
Why don’t we just pick up the phone anymore or pick it up as often as we used to? Is it because we are too lazy or busy to engage in a formal conversation? Are we concerned the person on the other end may invite us somewhere that we really don’t want to go and we feel guilty saying no or because we haven’t made contact for 7 months and it feels less awkward if a SMS is used? Maybe all of the above?
We can connect with people so conveniently and with such immediacy, yet many of us still tend to take the easy option. The GenYers in the office text more than they call – maybe it’s because sending a message is cheaper or free? I’m not sure.
I read some survey findings with interest, it was about relationships and technology. The findings revealed that 67% of Australians who felt lonely frequently contacted family and friends by SMS and 64% that felt lonely contacted family and friends by email. Some 40% of people that used around 4 methods of communication were lonely compared with 11% that only used one method.
Did we really need a survey to tell us that and are our family and friends really that lonely? Here’s my anecdotal yardstick, I reckon if you analyse the method of communications that your friends or family use to contact you, the length of the correspondence will help to determine the level of their loneliness. For example, if someone sends you a text message that you have to scroll more than twice to read it in full, then it means they are lonely or really bored and if you receive an email with more than 200 words about what is going on in their life -you got it, they’re lonely or bored out of their mind.
Maybe we’re all just trying to cram so much into everyday and the expectation of society holistically is so high, we would prefer to hide behind the guise of technology. Maybe people aren’t really lonely, but just alone…and maybe by choice?
Food for thought.














